She’s Out of My Life

I’m only being slightly less dramatic than Michael in this video

The week began terribly, stressful, and I whined about it a bit here. But by Thursday evening, I was sipping on a very strong margarita at a local Mexican restaurant, and I was convinced that things had finally turned around for me. It was not to be. Today, while tidying up the kitchen, my wonderful, awesome, lovely, housemate told me that she had just signed a lease for a one-bedroom apartment and will be moving out at the end of April. To say I was bummed is an understatement.

Good friends are difficult to find. Good housemates are even more difficult to find, especially as you get older and people become more set in their ways. Not only was my housemate (we’ll call her the Good Witch) kind and considerate but she was also an excellent communicator. She wasn’t passive-aggressive and had no problem engaging in uncomfortable conversations if they helped to ensure that housemate needs and boundaries were respected. I am bummed.

Although it should not, her departure is causing me to reflect a bit more on my own immediate housing plans. The Good Witch is moving to a one-bedroom apartment in a chic area of town at slightly below-market rent. At $1,300.00, it is still significantly more than I pay or would feel comfortable paying for rent. That being said, I am a bit envious of her. I know that she earns what I used to earn at University B and has about $50,000.00 in student loan debt. While she has every intention of paying it off, she said the pandemic has warned her against “delaying ‘living'”…

I’m bummed.



10 thoughts on “She’s Out of My Life

  1. “ Good friends are difficult to find. Good housemates are even more difficult to find” — this! 100%! Sorry for the loss.

    Are you leaning towards getting a new housemate or moving to your own one bedroom place?

    Everyone has their own definition of what “living” means. Hers may be to live in her own place. But if that’s not a priority in your life, I don’t see why you should be swayed by her decision. I would try to find a new housemate to keep your rent low if you’re not in any rush to live in your own.

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    • March is still a struggle at work so I am trying not to make any decisions at this point…I think I’m going to try and reflect a bit more in April.

      For now, unless my landlord raises my rent significantly (more than $150.00) I expect that I will stay put at least one more year.

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    • It really is. Her departure doesn’t have a financial impact on me as we each signed separate leases with my landlord. One of the reasons that my rent is so cheap is that my landlord lives permanently abroad and we all kind of serve as rental managers. I assume my departing housemate will try and find a replacement but I will help her (it behooves me to help her as it would allow me to be a part of the vetting process for the next housemate).

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  2. Oh, I’m so sorry. I lived with my last housemates for (more or less) seven years and obviously we became very good friends. There were good reasons to finally move out but I’m still sad about it at least three times a week. I’ve had a lot of mediocre roommates, a couple bad ones, and a few that I’ve loved living with so much…. it’s my dream to have a great housemate situation again someday.

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    • Awe, seven years, I can only imagine. That is a significant chunk of your life to have spent with someone. I have had all those experiences as well…the challenge with housemates is that it’s usually totally random.

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  3. Man it really is hard to find a roommate who isn’t passive aggressive. I hope your situation works out in whatever that means for you. After adding up what I was paying in storage, rent and such, I found that if I added $150 to it, I could live alone even while paying off debt. Peace in your home is so, so important.❤️

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    • Yes! Awe, thanks Blissful. That is an awesome calculation and one I have done previously. Unfortunately, rent in my city has increased so much and my current rent is so cheap (including free storage in the garage and free parking) that my landlord would have to increase my rent by $450.00 before it would make sense for me to even look…and not in a super nice area lol

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  4. Finding houses – or housemates – is really tough, hopefully it won’t be an issue for long

    I get what you mean about the jealousy though, I see people going on vacations, or even just living alone, and I get very bitter that I cant afford that, even though deep down I know that a lot of it is funded by debt and I’m debt free… it’s a trade off that, most days, I’m happy to make. Most days.

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    • Thanks, Mx Emmin…
      “…I can’t afford that…” – Sometimes this is true and sometimes I could afford it but I have different priorities…
      “I know that a lot of it is funded by debt and I’m debt free… it’s a trade off that, most days, I’m happy to make. Most days.” – This is exactly how I feel. Most days I don’t care…my financial well-being isn’t Instagram friendly but it keeps me warm at night. And then there are other days where I feel like…I wish I had different priorities lol

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