October 2022 – Life Update

I know ya’ll…I know. I would like to begin by thanking folks who left comments or sent messages (Blissful, Avery, Ellen) to check-in. If I have not already, I WILL be responding. However, as I know talk is cheap, I wanted to actually get a post up before I responded to your messages saying “I’ll post soon,” and then you know…not post soon.

– My last post here about work was the rather abrupt announcement of my resignation from Organization C. While I had my usual September 2022 – Student Loan Balances Update post, I never got around to posting about my wrap-up at Organization C… July 31st was technically my last day at Organization C and University B. However, as I had already been hired by another unit within University B, in a part-time, 9-month, temporary capacity, my departure from there felt less permanent. On my last day at Organization C, I felt nothing but relief. I really, really disliked my boss. He was mean, entitled, and didn’t treat me or my colleagues with respect. Despite knowing this, I was still hesitant to tell anyone about my departure from Organization C because I didn’t feel as though they would ever really appreciate why I decided to depart…and this turned out to be mostly true. While my friends were “supportive,” it was clear from facial expressions and language choices that most of them didn’t think it could be “that bad” as it was a remote role; and despite knowing all the gory and ongoing details, my best friend even said at one point, “Maybe you can get your job back at Organizations C, they clearly need you…”

I think this lack of understanding of why I left led to me seeking validation for my choice through subsequent events at Organization C. I was confident with my choice to leave, never regretted it, and external validation should not have been unnecessary but…I’m human. The first bit of validation came when the reviews for my replacement (she actually replaced me and another departing colleague…hey girl 👋🏿, if you’re reading this) were not great. A couple of colleagues that remained at Organization C and an external partner reached out to me after only a few weeks to express their frustration with her lack of interest in the work with a direct quote being, “I’m not impressed with your replacement…” While I would never wish for my replacement not to flourish, this replacement happened to be a good friend of my former boss and the nepotism was clear. The second bit came earlier this week when colleagues at Organization C reached out to say that during the biweekly staff meeting, my boss sprung a significant budgetary shortfall on them and said that if they did not come up with ideas to mitigate the shortfall that their salaries would be impacted. He then proceeded to grill them about potential ideas, dismissing all of them. As I have said numerous times, I LOVED my colleagues at Organization C. They were all bright, smart, hardworking, and direct communicators. I miss them. But my boss is a terrible leader and the current challenges before the organization were clear to me after being there for only a few months. I repeatedly explained to my former boss that funders were looking to support local organizations doing work “closer to the ground” and that our model of community engagement was outdated. However, when sharing this perspective, and direct feedback from a principal grantor, not only did he interrupt me, he dismissed my assessment. My former colleagues all shared that during one-on-one conversations, he shared that his model wasn’t the problem and that Organization C would still be getting funding if he were “a woman of color.” Right.

My first official day working for the new unit at University B was on August 31st. However, due to hiring and programming delays, the first day of training did not happen until September 28th…which meant I didn’t make any income from University B in September. This was tough. Even with the first week or so of September dedicated to the MCAT, I really expected to make more money than I did. While the delayed start at University B was part of it, I could have started back on the gig apps sooner. I think taking gigs and seeing the same people I saw a year ago and them wondering why I was coming back was a bit tougher on my ego than I wanted to adimt. However, by the last week of September, I got over myself and started back up with Qwick. I also completed the onboarding for UpShift (more on that later).

$$$ Out – September was mostly a money-out month. In addition to my general monthly expenses, I took a long weekend north to visit my best friend and meet her new partner. I also had to pay $600.00 for the primary round of applications to medical school (more on that later). And finally, after 8 months of making +$6,000.00 between income from University B, Organization C, and miscellaneous work, it was really, really hard to readjust to my much, much, much lower income. However, it is a long overdue adjustment and I plan to do a hard reset for October.

$$$ In – September was a low-income month. I didn’t expect to reach my maintenance income goal of $2,000.00 because I spent the first 9 days studying or taking the MCAT, and then went out of town to visit my best friend, however, I expected that I would earn…more. Between Qwick gigs and miscellaneous work for a colleague, I earned about $410.00 in September. This means that most of October’s bills were paid for with savings. While my emergency fund of $5,000.00 remains untouched, my general savings is much lower than I would like. My goal in October is to earn $2,500.00 which would cover November expenses and add a bit back to savings (more on that later).

Dating – I didn’t really have time to date in September. A couple of guys asked me out and I was tempted but…I’m still making comparisons to Gentleman Avery, which isn’t fair to them or me. I sent him a message letting him know that I needed a bit of space. He generally doesn’t react well to me pulling away so I blocked him after I sent the message so that I wouldn’t have to manage his response. This wasn’t my most mature moment, however, I would be an idiot not to learn from past experience. I am a lot of things but I am not an idiot. I needed the space, so I took it.

More, later.

7 thoughts on “October 2022 – Life Update

    • Thank you for taking the time to post an update and really just to let us know that you are okay ’cause with this whole “recession not a recession, but really is a recession” thing going on, it is pretty worrisome. I know you will make it through. Now is not a time to worry about your ego regarding work so I’m glad you recognized that pretty quick. 🌻

      Liked by 1 person

      • Thanks, Blissful. For the record, you are one of those emails to which I need to respond and will in a moment. Between work, studying for the MCAT, and applying to medical school the past couple of months have been a lot. But I am in a better place with it all and will resume posting regularly. As always, thank you for your support. Once I catch up here, I will head over to your blog to catch up on all your posts!

        Liked by 1 person

      • I meant to respond about Gentleman Avery and I concur with Ellen. You really must do what you must do. I meant something like him almost 17 years ago. Man that sounds so long ago😳🤠. He turned out to be NO good 🚫. I hope this person is not the same.

        Liked by 1 person

  1. You had so much change happening this month! Good for you for being willing to get through all this harder stuff on both the job and dating fronts. It sounds like a lot but it’s clearly leading you to a better place.

    As far as Organization C, I have had a toxic boss in the past and it’s never a bad decision to get yourself out of that situation. I’m interested to hear what your next step will be, as well as after that…medical school! So exciting! I’m watching the new season of Gray’s Anatomy, so I am ON BOARD with this decision. 🙂

    If blocking Gentleman Avery is how you can actually stay away from him, then I think that’s smart. I’m quite sure there’s a McDreamy waiting for you, anyway.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks, Ellen 🙂 It has been a ton…

      Ha! Well, it will be the next step if I get admitted. I am also considering another path that would include graduate school, but it would be a path that I could work during, IF I don’t get admitted to medical school. If nothing else, I am a planner. I am super grateful for your support. There is really little I can do now until my scores get back and I see if I will have scores good enough to warrant moving forward with secondary applications.

      Bwhahaha…there is no McDreamy out there. And the blocking will work…at least for now. Distance doesn’t make the heart grow fonder. It makes the heart forget.

      Liked by 1 person

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